Minivan To The Moon

[Intro]
Seat belts off
Dad hats on
Wallets gone
But the vibes still strong (uh)

[Verse 1]
Cargo shorts king, socks to the calf
Got three car seats and a dad-bod laugh
Bluetooth yelling, “Kids, don’t touch that!”
Meanwhile I’m leveraging the house like a frat
Minivan mortgage on a meme with a dog
“I researched it”… skimmed one blog
Wife on the porch like, “Explain this dip?”
“I can’t hear you, honey, I’m zoomin’ on a ship” (skrrt)

[Chorus]
We took the minivan to the moon, now it’s gone
But I’m still yellin’ “next pump!” lawn chair on the lawn
Lost every last cent, but the group chat say “strong”
I’m a broke hype dad with a grill and a bong (uh)
YOLO in the chat, kids eatin’ canned beans
Still I’m screenshot flexin’ old all‑time highs memes
Whole fam wrecked, yet I’m playin’ it cool
Cuz the next green candle gonna pay for their school (right?)

[Verse 2]
Got a spreadsheet, it’s just vibes and hope
Got a DCA plan that’s mostly cope
Told my son, “College? That’s what bags are for”
Now he’s selling lemonade to reopen the door
At PTA talkin’ “portfolio rotation”
Teacher asked “math?” I said “token allocation”
Baby’s first words? “Dad, you sell?”
I said “Diamond hands, kid” as the price just fell (oh no)

[Chorus]
We took the minivan to the moon, now it’s gone
But I’m still yellin’ “next pump!” lawn chair on the lawn
Lost every last cent, but the group chat say “strong”
I’m a broke hype dad with a grill and a bong (hey)
YOLO in the chat, kids eatin’ canned beans
Still I’m screenshot flexin’ old all‑time highs memes
Whole fam wrecked, yet I’m playin’ it cool
Cuz the next green candle gonna pay for their school (trust)

[Bridge]
[Beat drops to just bass and snaps]
Wife in the doorway, arms crossed, stare
Me: “It’s a long‑term play, you just don’t care”
She said “Which term? Short, mid, or late?”
I said “All of the above, babe, appreciate the faith” (uh)
Neighbors cuttin’ coupons, I’m cuttin’ loss charts
Kids draw my bags with crayons, call it “modern art”
Might sleep on the couch, but I’ll never sleep on the trend
If this one hits zero, I’ll just ape in again (let’s go)

[Chorus]
We took the minivan to the moon, now it’s gone
But I’m still yellin’ “next pump!” lawn chair on the lawn
Lost every last cent, but the group chat say “strong”
I’m a broke hype dad with a grill and a bong (woah)
YOLO in the chat, kids eatin’ canned beans
Still I’m screenshot flexin’ old all‑time highs memes
Whole fam wrecked, yet I’m playin’ it cool
Cuz the next green candle gonna pay for their school (maybe)